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  1. Post
    #1
    Ok so after days of asking for help on these forums and whatnot, I decided to straight up write my speech and try bullshit my way though it. Here it is so far.

    Constructive criticism would be really helpful!


    Topic: Masturbation is good for you - Church is wrong about it

    How many times have you heard the saying 'too much masturbation will make you go blind'...only to find after countless of years after you have discovered this magnificent act...that your eye sight is still intact and there hasn't even been a hint of going blind! What about the saying, roughly reminiscent to the catholic church's view, that Masturbation is pretty much killing your would be children and is murder in the eyes of God? That the semen which is lost could possibly be part of what makes your child...only to think 'HA what nonsense and bullocks this is..my semen alone couldn't produce a child, masturbation is good for you'. If that is what your thoughts are..then my friend you are right. Masturbation Is good for you.

    Good morning ladies and gentlemen, as you would have already known, my speech for today is about masturbation, and how it is actually good for you. During the duration that I am up here, I will be talking about what is masturbation, what the church's view on it is, why that view is incorrect, how masturbation is technically and mentally good for you in moderation, and why we shouldn't be ashamed of it.

    To be continued

  2. Post
    #2
    yes, good luck doing a speech on masturbation.

    jesus christ, it's just a speech. Whenever I couldn't be ****ed doing something in school, I just didn't do it. And I turned out fine.

  3. Post
    #3
    Why not? My class is full of guys and theres only 3 girls there + one female teacher. Plus its a catholic school which makes it even better!

    Pete the Pirate wrote:
    I once had to do a speech in history class.

    The dude who went before me used the same subject, so I got up after he finished and said "yeah, basicaly what he said" and sat down.


    **** I was cool.
    LOL. What mark did you get?

  4. Post
    #4
    I have pretty poor eyesight tbh.

  5. Post
    #5
    scholar wrote:
    I have pretty poor eyesight tbh.
    Not enough masturbating tbh

  6. Post
    #6
    Hmm on second thoughts I'm not sure whether this will pull me an A

  7. Post
    #7
    I never wrote a speech earlier than the night before I had to give it... Got a merit once as well... not that that means anything though...

  8. Post
    #8
    do a speech on how giving speeches at school is ****ing annoying.

  9. Post
    #9
    you're writing a speech on masturbation, and you're in a Catholic school..... ooo bad move!

  10. Post
    #10
    Popin wrote:
    Hmm on second thoughts I'm not sure whether this will pull me an A
    [sarcasm]oh yeah of course this will get you an A![/sarcasm]

  11. Post
    #11
    Yeah I could do that...and how much stress it causes some people like me!

  12. Post
    #12
    Just read a lengthy post from CEPP

  13. Post
    #13
    plus you'd be known in college as a furious masterbater

  14. Post
    #14
    Oh well I'm pretty sure everyone in my school mastys...its a guy school come on!

    Yeah I've tried looking through it Shinobi but all I can find are one paragraphd posts

  15. Post
    #15
    Popin wrote:
    Hmm on second thoughts I'm not sure whether this will pull me an A
    who cares about the A, itll make you a school legend, go for it

  16. Post
    #16
    LOL

    omg you really don't like doing speeches do you?
    Vegrandis
    Guest

  17. Post
    #17
    lol you're going to get hosed

  18. Post
    #18
    Nope hate them...well the writing part. Presenting it is a piece of cake.

  19. Post
    #19
    I wrote a speech on string. Top speech of the class.

  20. Post
    #20
    string theory or just string

  21. Post
    #21
    Popin wrote:
    How many times have you heard the saying 'too much masturbation will make you go blind'...only to find after countless of years after you have discovered this magnificent act...that your eye sight is still intact and there hasn't even been a hint of going blind! What about the saying, roughly reminiscent to the catholic church's view, that Masturbation is pretty much killing your would be children and is murder in the eyes of God? That the semen which is lost could possibly be part of what makes your child...only to think 'HA what nonsense and bullocks this is..my semen alone couldn't produce a child, masturbation is good for you'. If that is what your thoughts are..then my friend you are right. Masturbation Is good for you.

    Good morning ladies and gentlemen, as you would have already known, my speech for today is about masturbation, and how it is actually good for you. During the duration that I am up here, I will be talking about what is masturbation, what the church's view on it is, why that view is incorrect, how masturbation is technically and mentally good for you in moderation, and why we shouldn't be ashamed of it
    What a crap speech.

    It has a potentially good subject, but is absolutely murdered by crap writing.

    Don't even try using it.

  22. Post
    #22
    i hope you'll be discussing techniques and accessories

  23. Post
    #23
    Greek wrote:
    What a crap speech.

    It has a potentially good subject, but is absolutely murdered by crap writing.

    Don't even try using it.
    Then show me how its done.

  24. Post
    #24
    you go up and down

  25. Post
    #25
    HollowPoint wrote:
    i hope you'll be discussing techniques and accessories
    AHAHAHA, nice

    I say change it from "how the church is wrong" to an educational speech on how its done